A Day in our Life

I figured it would be nice to record what a typical day looks like at home with our newborn son. I am documenting things in his baby book as well. So what does a “normal” day in our life look like? 

  • Get up with daddy about 6 am so he can spend time with baby before he leaves for work (mom usually sleeps through this feed & diaper change bc daddy is so great!) 
  • Get up with mommy about 8 am and get a diaper change. Then nurse as mommy drinks the coffee daddy made for her with the amazing Ninja machine 
  • Go in the mamaRoo for a swing as mommy tries to eat breakfast, tend to the dogs, wash bottles, wash & fold laundry, etc. 
  • Nurse again! Get on my playmat for awhile & play with mommy, do some bicycle kicks & get tummy rubs
  • Naptime (sometimes) while mommy eats lunch, and Nanna visits
  • Outside time enjoying the fresh air on our porch, usually with bottle of formula so boobs get a little break lol
  • Mommy reads books aloud that play music or talk in the nursery
  • Daddy comes home & mommy gets to shower (sometimes even nap since it never happens during the day) and have an adult beverage. Daddy feeds me a bottle. 
  • Tummy time & bath take place! Still hating the sponge baths. 
  • Bedtime-baby boy loves to be swaddled up and wear mittens to sleep after he nurses. 
  • Up every 2 hrs to eat and get changed with mommy 

All of this easily changes depending on baby boys mood. For example, if he is constipated or gassy, add in a few hours of crying as an activity! Even when that happens, I try to do all of the above at some point during our day together. Hoping to add in daily stroller walks now since it has been a month since my c-section and the weather is so nice. What else do you mommies do during the days with your babes?

So blessed to have the opportunity to do all the things I always dreamed of with my miracle!

Rookie Mom Musings

Its hard to imagine my life now without our little IVF miracle in it. I am so grateful everyday that he is finally here. Sometimes I still dont believe it, sometimes I get scared and think about losing him (thanks to our past losses). 

Overall, things are going very well. Baby boy is almost a month old now. Boy, how time flies. Everyday is a learning experience, below are some things that have been happening so far-

  • Isaac has gained a pound since he was born! He is now 8 lbs, 11 oz. This is great news. Between the breastfeeding, pumping, & formula, I was not sure if he was gaining enough. Turns out he is right on track. 
  • Gripe Water and Mylicon are very helpful for infant gas. They have done wonders for our son in this department. 
  • The “witching hours” are a real thing. They happen nightly from about 7pm until midnight or so. 
  • I plan to start baby wearing in the next week if possible, probably after my post partum appt. and finding out all looks good with my c-section incision. He is at the stage now where he constantly wants to be held. We have both a Solly and an Ergo 360 to try out. 
  • The Moro Reflex that babies do is so cute. I am noticing he does it less and less as he gets older. Can we slow down time just a little bit?
  • Isaac likes both car and stroller rides so far, he just sleeps the whole time. Thank God! 
  • I have broken some of the after c-section recovery rules…for instance, I have been bathing since week 3 and was told not to until week 6. It is my saving grace after a long day. 
  • Baby boy has many nicknames-little burrito, stinkarooskie, and buddy to name a few. 
  • Newborn photography is NOT cheap. We met with our photographer and got to see all the photos she took, and I really have no clue how we will choose which package to purchase. We need to decide if we want to buy an album, digital files, or individual prints. As of now, I am pretty sure we are going with an album that includes about 25 photos (shown below) and a 17×26 canvas to hang in our formal dining room. My mom plans to purchase a couple digital files so we can always access them down the road. I really want to buy digital files as well, but financially its not feasible. 

  • Baby acne is not cute. Enough said here.
  • After getting the OK from our pediatrician, I had my first beer yesterday in about 11 months! It was greaaaaat.
  • My Blanqui post partum leggings are a lifesaver. They literally are all I have worn out of the house since giving birth. I also have a pair of Lula Roe’s, which I like for comfort, but the Blanqui’s def hold in the flab better. 
  • Just like our dogs have different barks, Isaac has different cries. We are starting to recognize which is which-hunger cry, tired cry, hold me cry, change me cry, etc. 
  • Isaac has a obvious tongue tie and lip tie which are affecting our feedings. I will post more about this soon as I am still processing it all myself. 

The 4th Trimester 

Some observations and things to note as Isaac turns 2 weeks old tomorrow-

  • The site where my c-section incision was is still numb…I am wondering if I have permanent nerve damage or if this is normal? 
  • No one tells you how constipated you will be after a c-section. Sorry if TMI, but I mean seriously. I have had other surgeries and been behind, but this is like no other. Awful! 
  • I gained 40 lbs total while pregnant, dropped 20 lbs within the first week of delivering him, and am sure the remaining 20 will be much harder. 
  • Our baby boy sleeps for about 2-3 hours at a time between feedings and throughout the night. This is not bad from what I hear from other newborn parents. 
  • Although he sleeps “good” for a newborn, I am still feeling sleep deprived. I have decided that sleep deprivation is probably a form of torture somewhere in the world. 
  • Baby boy has been doing tummy time everyday and can already lift his head and turn it side to side. I cant believe how strong he is. 
  • I am still breastfeeding, pumping, and supplementing with formula. During our hospital stay, Isaac had low blood sugar and needed formula. I have continued to give him some each night, but I hope to wean him off it soon. 
  • I am pumping about 3-4 ounces total each session. I am hoping this increases with time??? 
  • Isaac hiccups a lot, and doesnt tend to burp much, the doctor said this is normal, but I am hoping it eases up and we can get some belches out of him soon. I purchased some Gripe Water and will give it to him soon if not. 
  • Dr. Brown’s bottles seem to be the best fit for our boy. So far we have also tried Avent, Tommee Tippee, & Playtex.
  • Baby boy has visited his pediatrician twice so far and is almost back to his birth weight. All else looks good. 
  • I do not want hubby to leave us this week and go back to work! It has been amazing having him home. Can we hit the lotto please?!?
  • Time is flying by. Part of me wants Isaac to grow because he is so fragile and I worry about things like SIDs. The other part of me cries even thinking about him growing so fast.
  • I have no clue if I could handle being pregnant again (we have 1 frostie left), and I am talking mentally, not physically.  Or maybe I mean both. It was extremely tough on me both ways. 
  • Isaac currently sleeps in his mamaRoo in our bedroom. They should call this thing a lifesaver! He did not like the Halo bassinest much. Thank God we got it second hand at a thrift store and didnt pay full price, as it has been converted to an additional changing table in our room. 
  • The dogs are adjusting well overall to baby’s arrival. If anything they are just curious and protective already. We included them both in our newborn photos we had taken. 
  • Isaac loves to pee (and poop occasionally) all over us as soon as we take off his diaper. He has ruined many outfits already.
  • The future of this blog is unknown. I will always be an infertile, but a new chapter of our lives has now begun, and it may be time to rest Surviving Infertility. 

Birth Story

I want to record our son Isaac’s birth story before anything becomes forgotten, and have been meaning to do so all week,  but truthfully I have been so in awe of him that I havent made the time yet. Hubby is currently out to the store (thank God he took the first 2 weeks off) and I am feeling quite tired but need to stay awake so what better time than now!

We were admitted to the hospital on Sunday, 12/18/16, at 7:30 p.m. for our induction. The nurses that greeted us gave us the biggest and nicest labor room on the floor. The room had a pull out bed for dad, baby warming station, flat screen TV, jetted tub and shower, and of course my hospital bed. Upon arriving, I put on my own special order gown and had my vitals taken. We unpacked our bags and hubby found the ice machine (my best friend!) on the floor. 

Around 9 p.m. my nurse inserted my hep lock IV and got me hooked up to the machines. She showed hubby and I how we could monitor my contractions and the babys heartrate if we like. We could adjust the volume easily, and unplug the machine for bathroom use throughout the night. I gave the nurse my birth plan and she eased some of my fears. 

By 10 p.m. that night I had my cervix checked and cervidil inserted into it. For the first two hours the meds are in you need to stay laying down. I was about 2 cm dilated and 50% effaced at the time it was inserted. The cervidil was to soften my cervix and is supposed to be left in for 12 hrs. I must say that having it inserted was not a pleasant experience at all. It took about 4 tries for my nurse to get it in the right spot, which she emphasized how important doing so was. Finally, she had success and we were on our way! 

I didnt expect to have contractions or major cramping throughout the middle of the night with he cervidil. My OB had said I probably wouldnt feel much, if anything, until the next morning, but by midnight I was both contracting and cramping. I must have unhooked myself from the machine every hour to go pee. The benadryl they gave me to get some sleep was pointless. I was up around the clock. 

Around 4 a.m. I began to think shit was getting real. I wanted another cervix check but my nurse convinced me to try and hold off until morning came. At 6 a.m. I literally heard a “pop” and jumped up. Then came the gush. Or gushes I should say. My water broke. It was warm and clear, mixed with blood. Almost immediately after, the pain intensified. I was 4 cm dilated, and wanted to discuss the epidural so I paged my nurse in. 

By now, hubby was up and I got on the birthing ball and began practicing deep breaths. The contractions were intense. I wondered how the heck I was going to make it! The anesthesiologist came in and talked to me, and I went over my history of scoliosis wih him the best I could between the contractions, now coming every 3 minutes. He had trouble getting the needle in initially, I believe it took 3 tries. 

Minutes after the epidural, my blood pressure plumetted and I felt awful. They said I looked green. They pumped me with some other drugs and eventually got me back to where I needed to be. The epidural eased my pain for the time being, and by noon I was close to 7 cm dilated I believe. Hubby and I got some much needed sleep during this time.  

By 4 p.m. my pain level was increasing again, and I kept hitting the damn medicine button hooked up to my IV. It didnt seem to do much after awhile though. I continued to listen to my Circle + Bloom meditational CD and applied some essential oils in hopes of relaxing. I even had a special picture with me for a focal point. 

The nurse and midwife decided to give me a low dose of Pitocin to see if we could speed things up a bit. They also decided to monitor my contractions internally instead of just externally. So some other contraption was put inside of me. 

By 6 p.m., I was 10 cm dilated and in major pain. The epidural from the morning had long worn off and I was cursing the world. I had been pushing on and off for a good hour, and hubby and the team saw Miracle’s head several times. I heard the machines going off like something was wrong consistently when pushing. 

I kept asking about baby, and he was doing just fine as it appeared on the screen. I was the one in distress, not him. The machines were beeeping like crazy because of my heartrate. It was accelerating a lot, at times up to 170. The team was not happy with this at all, and my OB was called in to do a c-section right away. 

I started crying. It had been a long 20 something hours of labor only to have to be operated on. I felt like such a failure in that moment. Why didnt I just opt for the c-section in the first place? Thankfully everyone around me came together to make me realize it wasnt my fault and all I remember thinking was ‘please God, get my baby here soon.’

The anesthesiologist quickly gave me another epidural, and some other drugs for blood pressure, nausea, and anxiety, and we were being wheeled off. The epidural started working, and they were scrubbing me off as I shook and chattered my teeth. My speech was slurred, my eyes half closed, and I was really feeling drugged up. I remember I kept asking if baby was okay. I always heard how great he was doing back. Hubby was next to me holding my hand the whole time. 

I felt a decent amount of tugging and pulling, and medical jargon talk in the background. Lots of “almost there” and “I can see him” pep talks being given to me. Intense feelings of being smashed on top of my chest followed.  Then at 6:57 p.m., I heard the sound I have been waiting to hear for almost a decade, our sweet rainbow baby crying. 


I started crying instantly and I heard the team laughing about how he was peeing as they pulled him out. Hubby got to cut the cord and he received his perfect Apgar score. He was then brought over to see me. I couldnt believe it. Finally. 

Almost Go Time

Well, well, where to begin? I feel as if I have been under an information overload the past few weeks, mainly trying to make the final call between scheduling a c-section or trying to birth our child vaginally first. Due to our history, it has been a lot of back and forth with OBs, REs, MFMs, orthopedics, & anesthesists on which situation would be best.  

Final call-we will attempt birthing vaginally.  If I havent gone into labor by the 18th, Ill be admitted for cervical ripening and induction that day. Yes, thats right… we have a date folks! And its so close that I cant even believe it. We are super excited! If during a vaginal birth, he shows any signs of distress my OB will immediately do a section. I will be under continous monitoring once induced. 

It would be nice if he decides to come on his own before I need induced, but are also okay with it if he does not. At this point, we trust our vast medical team very much and will follow what is deemed safest for mom & baby. 

Recap of his health-We had our weekly NST and BPP yesterday, and baby boy did well. The week before he was being difficult during the stress test (his heart rate was not accelerating enough with his movements) and I was getting so upset. I was on the damn machine for probably an hour, when you can be on & off it in 15 minutes if baby performs. 


The nurse gave me juice, let me go pee, and even zapped me with a tazer like device on my stomach at one point. Lets just say he did NOT enjoy that at all, and he finally passed right after it. Maybe he remembered it from the week before and got to work yesterday because we passed the first 15 minute go around. Thank God. He then scored 8/8 on his biophysical profile ultrasound. Another sigh of relief. 

My fundal height is measuring a little smaller the past 2 weeks, probably since I havent gained any weight. But he is still in the 40 something percentile and measuring close to 7 lbs, so the doctors are not worried. I feel so bad knowing there are many ladies out there struggling with uterine growth restriction-I cannot imagine how upsetting and frustrating this is. I know I eat A LOT and still cant gain. Totally out of our own hands.

Something important to note-my OB wasnt too happy with my blood pressure yesterday and doesnt want me waiting a whole week to get it checked again. So, I go in Monday for a quick blood pressure check. If its still high, we might be seeing Miracle sooner than later. 

Other news-I feel like there is no more time! I have been doing all my last minute nesting each day. I make a list, and somehow another one pops up. Lol. Thankfully they are all little things, all the big things are done, and we would totally be fine if nothing else got done at this point. Part of me just feels like I have to stay busy for some reason! Then the other half of me feels like I have to rest, so I do. Its a good balance. 

We have arrangements made for the dogs during our hospital stay, got the baby a health insurance plan of his own, hooked up baby monitors, called my cleaning ladies and scheduled them around our possible induction date so the house is nice & clean for baby to come home to! Ive wrapped all our Christmas presents and put them under the tree. I have an appointment to get my nails done next week, pretty close to delivery so they look pretty for our professional newborn photo session. I even treated myself to a few postpartum outfits…2 pairs of Blanqi leggings and 4 tunic tops. Super excited to live in these for awhile. 

Symptoms-Oh my. Tons. Constipation, which has never been an issue, now is. I am eating prunes and hoping to see some improvement. Stay away hemorrhoids!! Heartburn. Shortness of breath. Snoring. Talking (or even yelling) in my sleep. Peeing all the time. Fatigue. Pregnancy brain…I think thats all???

A Dilemma 

I was diagnosed with a pretty severe case of scoliosis when I was in the 5th grade. I started seeing an orthopedic surgeon at that time, and the best option to prevent my curve from progressing was to wear a back brace. I hated the thing, but ended up wearing it 22 hrs a day for what seemed like forever. Im guessing it was a year or two in all reality. 

The back brace did its job for many years, and my curve stayed at what it was since the time I was an adolescent. I got yearly x-rays and that was about it. Fast forward to around age 21 or 22, I started to experience pain in my back and neck, something the scoliosis had never previously caused. My yearly x-rays revealed my curve had jumped another 10 degrees. I had always been a candidate for surgery, but now I most certainly was. My curve was now somewhere in 50 degree range. 


The surgery itself is pretty serious, the doctors that perform it are limited, and there are a lot of different dynamics that play into it. I wont get into all that today because its not what this post is about. Its about how I always questioned how my back condition would play into a pregnancy and delivery. 

All the doctors I saw over the years never seemed toooo concerned about it. However, in the back of my mind, I was always worried. Worried about how painful pregnancy would be (which I try not to discuss much on this blog because I know how upsetting it can be to hear pregnant women complain when you are trying), worried about how I would be able to deliver my baby safely when I clearly was not built structurally “normal.”

Brings us to the current dilemma. I decided I should take my x-ray images to my OB appt this week just to make sure all looked okay delivery wise, since we are now at 33 weeks. Lets just say she was a little surprised by what she saw. I guess I hide my curve pretty well, or so Ive heard over the years. She immediately said I needed an anesthesia consult at the hospital because she wasnt sure if I could even receive an epidural or spinal block due to the curve. Her concern seemed to be getting the needles in place correctly. There was some talk of general anesthesia during delivery and thats when I started to feel the anxiety and fear building up as it used to at my doctor appointments. I heard words like “only options,” “very serious,” “baby born sleeping,” “dont see the baby for awhile” etc. I zoned out. 

After going through much bullshit to get the person I needed to talk to at the hospital, I was sitting in their office the next morning for a consult, x-ray images in hand. The anesthesiologist examined them and my spine. She explained that both epidurals and spinals are inserted into the L4 or L5 vertebrates, which are towards the bottom of the spine. This was very good news for me, because my curve is mostly towards the top of my spine. She was able to locate my L4 and L5 easily and said she would not have any issue getting either in at that location as my OB worried about. She credited my “small frame” (ha!) as making it easy for her to find. 

Worst case scenario? According to the anesthesiologist, an epidural or a spinal block in me may only numb one side, instead of both sides that should be numbed in a “normal” person. My curve may cause the medicine to stay on one side more than the other, but there is no way of knowing that until we try. 

Bottom line? It would be best to try to deliver vaginally first (even though my pelvis is quite tilted due to my scoliosis) with the possibility of an epidural that doesnt fully work, than to schedule a c-section and get a spinal block that doesnt fully work. 

If I was to get a spinal that didnt fully work, I would have to then undergo general anesthesia for the section. And that, of course, is what no one wants at all. 

The anesthesiologist put all of the notes into the computer system so that my OB and all the other anesthesiologists could see her findings. I am happy I got to speak with her, she relieved some of my fears. Now its on my OB and I moving forward as far as what we do. 

Baby boy is not breech anymore, which helps us avoid the c-section route. Also, his weight is not above average which us another positive in avoiding a section. Finally, my RE confirmed my myomectomy (fibroid removal) did not cut into the uterine wall since it was done lap. These facts are all in our favor for delivery vaginally. Now, at my next appt we need to look at my birth canal/pelvis and see if she thinks it could birth a baby without putting him in danger. 

I should wrap this up by saying that I do not care how our baby comes into this world as long as it is safely

All medical personnel agree that undergoing general anesthesia is not the ideal way to bring a baby safely into the world, although it can be done. My way of thinking (and hubbys)  is that perhaps we need to exhaust all options in case a worst case scenario comes up. 

Try vaginally. Get an epidural if needed. If it doesnt numb both sides, still try to push through. If he cant get out safely, move on to a c-section with a spinal block. Pray it numbs both sides. If it doesnt, last resort…get knocked out. 

Cant anything ever be easy?!?

Hello 3rd Trimester 

Its hard to believe both October & the 3rd trimester are upon us! Less than 12 weeks to go now.

I had my 1 hour glucose test this morning. I actually did a 2 hr test back when we were trying to figure out the cause of my recurrent pregnancy loss, so I was prepared for how yucky it is. This time I didnt get a flavor choice (boo!) and got stuck with orange. I did lemon lime the first time and it was much better! The orange burned as I was chugging it down and gave me a slight headache accompained by minor nausea. 

The nurse drew my blood for this and also did a CBC, my results should be in within the week. The midwife measured my fundal height which was between 28-29 weeks, and I am 28 weeks + 3 days so that was all good. She also did the doppler and his heartbeat was as usual. We chatted about movement, which I have noticed just in the past week has picked up a lot. I dont find myself needing to count like I was because its pretty consistent throughout the days now. I am happy about this bc counting sort of drives me mad! 

We also discussed vaginal v. c-section birth. I explained my fears both ways, and told her I just want to do whatever is safest for my baby. She listened and offered some personal stories in regards to my concerns. Long story short, she told me to prep for a vaginal birth as long as he isnt breech, or too large.  Our first labor class starts tomorrow and I am anxious for it. They told us to bring a yoga mat and 2 pillows…hopefully we will gain some valuable knowledge from these sessions! 

In other news…all good things must come to an end. Let me explain. We had our fresh IVF cycle back in March 2014, in which 7 out of our 8 embryos were frozen at that time. Since that time, we have had 4 total transfers (1 fresh + 3 frozen). Thankfully all of our embies have been kept free of charge at our RE’s office. We havent paid storage on any of our frosties, which has been wonderful as storage fees can get pretty pricey. Well, as I said, all good things must come to an end! We got a call this week from the storage company informing us that we need to update our forms on file as they will be picking up our one & only embryo at our RE’s office. I must say I was a bit sad, I loved our embryo being right where I know it is, safe & sound. However, I realize this is protocol and we got away with it for over 2 years now. Time to cough up more cash…nothing new in the world of IVF. 

As Im sure many of you know, the embryo storage forms make you think of morbid things like death of one partner, death of both partners, divorce, etc. In the middle of filling out the forms, I burst into tears. Thanks pregnancy hormones! I told hubby in the case I should die, I want him to have ownership of our embryo. I suggested that should he ever marry again, he could (have the option to) transfer our embryo into his new wife. He looked at me in disbelief, and thats when I lost it. This may sound odd to some, but its how I feel. We also agreed on the same should he pass before we transfer again. And if we both die, we elected to donate our child. Sounds really weird typing that. We couldnt come to terms with disposal, and we didnt want to transfer ownership to anyone and have that on their shoulders either. We will pay storage quarterly, and then revisit transferring Uno December of next year. 

My OB appts are now every 2 weeks, not sure of the MFM frequency as of yet. I see them this week for a growth scan, and I want to bring up a few things like NSTs and biophysical profiles. I dont want to fall to the wayside because things have continued to look good. I want to make sure we stay on top of things, especially monitoring later on as this can help prevent stillbirth. 

My baby shower is this weekend!!! How insane. I am super excited about it, but also anxious at the same time. I cried yesterday to hubby about it, and he reassured me that I deserve this shower. My aunt is flying in today, and then others follow throughout the week. I feel like I have so much to do still (thank God for cleaning ladies) before the shower…stop by the flower shop, finalize games, get my wedding ring cleaned, eyebrows waxed, nails done, etc. Im sure it will all come together though. Will post an update of it all soon!