ER Visit

I started feeling some pressure down there on & off this past week. After a few days of it, I phoned the on-call service at my OB’s office. My main fear was that my cervix could be shortening, even though it measured over 4 at my last ultra. The on call doctor referred me to the ER (I hate the ER). 

We ended up at the ER where my practice delivers soon after. The doc there (not part of their practice) did an internal exam and an abdominal ultra. He said my cervix “felt” closed and that baby was actively moving around with a good heartbeat. However, he said he could not get an accurate measurement of my cervical length there…in fact, his exact words were, “they always do it wrong here.” Real comforting to hear about the hospital right?

Anyways, he called the on-call doc at my OB practice and she said I should come in the next day when they open for an accurate measurement. Which, I might add, is what I wanted to do in the first place, but she freaked me out over the phone and encouraged me to go to the ER. Frustrating! 

I called my OB’s early the next day as instructed, and informed the receptionist of what was going on. She tried to tell me they didnt have any openings and would need to send me to the hospital. Um, no! I requested a nurse call me back. After an hour, still no call, I called again. A different receptionist said they were working on it and would call me back. At this point, I was irritated. How do they know how serious my situation is? I think some urgency would be nice. 

Around lunchtime, a nurse finally called me back and said they could get me in that afternoon for a cervical measurement scan. I asked if I would get to speak to someone about the results while I was there. She said no, someone would just call with the results, but that if things were bad, they wouldnt let me leave. Okay, whatever. 

The technician was sweet. She started with an abdominal ultra and I proceeded to tell her that these are not as accurate with cervical measurements. Why do I feel like I need to constantly tell medical personnel what is needed or not? So she said she would do an internal for the length. Thankfully, the cervical length was still over 4, & baby was alive & well. I think he was pretty annoyed (I cant blame him at this point) and wouldnt even look at the camera. 

I figured I was in the clear, until I got a call from the nurse this morning. She asked me if I knew that I have complete placenta previa? Um, no. Well, I do. She said it could be related to the pressure I am feeling down there. She recommended pelvic rest, and modified bed rest. Yep, back to the bed I go! I had a few weeks off from it at least.

I asked her the most important question of all-will this cause me to miscarry? Of course, I would have liked a solid “no” it will not. Instead I got, “nothings guaranteed, but most women who follow the instructions given go on to have successul pregnancies.” From my own research since, it appears that an early diagnosis such as mine is better than a late one. Some other points-

• A c-section is a must (already was happening from my fibroid removal) 
• I could experience painless bleeding at anytime
• This could resolve on its own, as my uterus grows, the placenta could move up with baby 
• If it doesnt resolve, hemmorage during birth is a major concern

I will be getting monitored weekly now instead of bi-weekly. I am thankful everyday for this pregnancy, but honestly cannot wait until December. I have set a smaller goal of getting to 24 weeks, or viability, since December seems so far off. Only 9 more weeks until then. I can do it. 

Please share with me your success stories with complete placenta previa. Thank you! 

First MFM Appt & More

We had our first appointment with the high risk doc this week. For the first time in awhile, I wasnt nervous going into the appointment (thanks to my doppler). In fact, my blood pressure was actually in normal range when taken. This is unusual for me. At my RE’s office, they learned to take it at the end of my appointments, after my scans, when my anxiety was gone. This time I had it taken before our ultrasound…celebrate the small steps!

The MFM office was very different than what we are used to. The office was packed, with row like, uncomfortable seating. There were loud kids and kids toys everywhere. Complete opposite of a fertility clinic. At our RE’s office, there were nice, comfy chairs and it was quite peaceful. We also had to wait over an hour, something else we arent accustomed to either. Despite the differences, we stayed open-minded and had a good visit overall.

One thing we both really liked was the huge flatscreen hanging on the wall in the ultrasound room. We didnt have this at our old clinic, and its nice to not strain to see baby on the little computer screen attached to the machine. We also had an abdominal ultra which was reassuring that we are moving along in this pregnancy. I coulnt believe how big our boy has gotten since we saw him last! 

The ultrasound tech kept commenting on how active he was. He was kicking away, although I cant feel any of it yet.  Last time we had a scan, it was tough to make out the facial profile but we can actually see hubby’s resemblence in the pic above. Simply amazing! 

After our scan, we met with the mid-wife (next time I will see the doc) and she reviewed our history and the scan. Thankfully, all looked perfect on the scan. Even though we did the Panorama already and it was low-risk, they still did the NT test and it came back negative too. Ill be going to my OB in 2 weeks and then back to MFM 2 weeks after that. Basically, appointments every 2 wks to measure my cervix. Speaking of my cervix, it was long (just over 4 cm) and closed. Thank God! 

I am 14 weeks today (officially out of the first trimester by all pregnancy calendars out there!!) and my new concern has become my cervix shortening. I had the LEEP done back in 2004, along with lots of other surgeries that put me at a slightly higher risk of it happening, such as d & c’s. I know plenty of women who had the LEEP and have been fine, but my mind sometimes goes down the path of negativity. A late term loss seems unimaginable and devastating. I am praying with the team of doctors I have we will catch anything that could occur right away. 

In other news, we put up a new fan in the nursery this week (thanks mom!). I really loved it because it has bead board blades and we are going with a whale theme which is somewhat beachy like the bead board. 

We also got the paint for the walls. This weekend we are tearing out the carpet and small baseboards in there so we can paint it. I cant wait! It’s also hubby’s bday tomorrow so we have a busy weekend ahead of us. 

Any symptoms? 

Weight gain! I couldnt believe it when I got weighed at the doctor this week. Im okay with it, just surprised. Ive already put on close to 10 lbs lol. Headaches on and off. Moodiness here & there. Lower backaches lately. I have pretty severe scoliosis to begin with (I wore a back brace for yrs as a kid), and a herniated disc, so I knew this was likely to be a problem during pregnancy. Hubby has been massaging me, and I have been icing it as needed. I still havent taken a hot bath or shower, which is what I miss more than anything right now. 

I ordered a few onesies off etsy and I must share them with you…

You cannot find things like this in stores so its well worth it. We also became FB official with our pregnancy this past week. A happy, but scary move for us. 

The pic included our due date, a shout out to our clinic, and one of our fav bible verses, 1 Samuel 1:27. 

When discussing my symptoms, I failed to mention my pregnancy brain as of lately (gee imagine that!). It has been bad, luckily Im not working right now bc I have been forgetting everything. That being said, I think there was more I wanted to say here, but it has slipped my mind.

Believing

I havent felt like blogging much lately. Its hard to explain, but I know a few other ladies who went through this phase once they fell pregnant again after losses and/or treatments. Still, I am always thinking of you ladies…no matter where you are in this process. 

I have been spending most of my time praying this pregnancy is going to stick. To help myself believe this, I have been keeping busy and doing things I never thought Id do should we be pregnant again. For instance, I have been buying baby clothes and things for the nursery. I have been wearing maternity clothes and taking weekly photos. We have been discussing names for our baby.  All of these things are helping me believe.  

We cleaned out our office last week. Regardless of expecting, it needed it badly. 

The room is now empty, except for the baby stuff we have. A lot of it has been purchased over the years, or sent by friends, family or followers. Sometimes I just go in the room early in the morning and sit and stare at it all. Its hard for me to believe it. 

We decided to go with a whale theme for the nursery. We plan to paint the walls grey, with white crown molding and baseboards, and either a navy or grey carpet.  We have looked at a few cribs, and are not sure if we want white or grey yet, thankfully we have plenty of time to decide. 

I am 13 weeks tomorrow and the first trimester has seemed like eternity. I dont have symptoms anymore, so I thank God for my doppler. I listen to miracle baby boy every morning.  His heartrate is usually anywhere from 125-150.  This is also the first week I have not had a doctor appointment since I became pregnant. Next week we see our MFM or high risk OB for the first time. They will do a consult and an ultra. I cant wait to see how much he has grown. 

Speaking of growing, some days I feel bigger than others. This initially freaked me out, but after talking to some others I realized its normal at this point in the pregnancy (bloat v. bump), especially being our first pregnancy to get this far.   My wonderful friend from up north sent me all of her maternity clothes this week. I cant even say how blessed I feel about this! I finally have things to wear that fit and it saved us a ton of money. 

In addition to all of these things I have been doing to believe, my mom and I also found a venue to book my baby shower at. We have set the date for October 9th. Ill be about 29 weeks then. Its a very beautiful location.

So that is about all that is happening here…trying to stay positive and enjoy my summer off. Before I know it, Ill be heading back to school in the fall. 

Where to Begin?

Ill start with an update on the doppler I ended up purchasing last week. I went back & forth about getting one, and I took every review written by you all in my prior post into consideration. Let me start off by saying I am so glad I bit the bullet and got one. 

When it first arrived, I was nervous to use it. I purchased the Sonoline B and it was only $35 new with shipping included. I got it off a website called Jet.com and there was a first time user $15 off coupon. I watched a few you tube tutorials before I began. I got frustrated after some time (probably 20 minutes) of not being able to find the heartbeat. I didnt freak out though, as I knew this could likely happen, especially the first time. So, I took a break, drank some juice, and let the dogs out. I was back at it for probably another 2o minutes when I realized that I had been focusing mainly right below my belly button, as this is what most of the you tube videos showed working. I decided to go lower, like all the way to the top of my pelvis bone. And wa-la! I found Miracle’s little heart beating away. I got butterflies as soon as I heard it! So special. 

Since the first day using it, I have been able to locate the heartbeat every morning within a minute or two. Miracle has been hanging out in the same spot all week so it makes it really easy. I first tried the doppler at exactly 11 weeks, and I have been told that baby will start to move up a little as I approach 12 weeks. I am assuming this means I wont be finding Miracle in the same spot, but thankfully I am prepared for that and hence not going to worry when that occurs. Overall, I would definitely recommend this product to any woman who needs the extra confidence during pregnancy. It really helps.

In other exciting news, we got the results of our Panorama screening test back. The results given come in 1 of 2 ways- high-risk or low-risk. Baby came back low-risk  for all trisomies tested! Thank God. We were prepared to love our child fully either way, but it is still a relief. The only other major screening I will do is the AFP (I believe thats the correct acronym, not 100%sure) at 16 weeks for Spina Bifida. 

We also found out the gender from the test!!! Initially, we planned to have a gender reveal party with our close friends and family. My mom offered to host, and it seemed perfect. As time went on, I started to reconsider having a party. I really have no clue why, but I did. In the end, hubby & I decided to do an intimate reveal with just the two of us, my mom, stepdad, & brother.  So when the doctors office called and said the results were in, I threw on some clothes and raced to get the results. We then went straight to Publix with the envelope! Thankfully, the lady at the bakery was super nice and said she would do it right on the spot…only a 20 minute wait! 

As hubby & I waited, I felt so nervous. It seemed like a million years. Eventually, we got the cupcakes and headed to my mom’s with our 2 doggies (of course they had to be part of the fun!). Hubby & I were sporting pink because our votes were girl, while the others thought boy. Mostly all of our friends and followers voted girl, with a few exceptions. 

We set up our phones to video and all cut the cupcakes at the same time…and we are thrilled to report we are having a baby BOY!!! Ahhhh!!! Such a shocker! We are so so so excited. 

It was such an amazing experience to share with our family, one I will never forget. Ive already watched the video a thousand times! Lol. After the reveal, mom & I had to go do a little shopping. We got some cute outfits I must say. 

Today I went for my 12 week OB appointment and we got to see baby again on ultrasound. He was being shy and it looked like he threw up his fist at us like “leave me alone!” At our appt, we set up bi-weekly scans for monitoring my cervix length starting in 2 weeks. I will get these until I am 24 weeks along. I also got the referral to an MFM doctor, which I will be seeing soon. 

Lastly, I found out I will have a c-section. At first, I was bummed because I really wanted to try naturally, but the more I thought about it, I just want what is best for baby and I. Since I had a myomectomy for my fibroid removal, and it was in my uterine wall, a vaginal delivery isnt safe. I guess my uterine wall could rupture because the muscles just arent as strong. My tenative date is set for December 18th. 

Its hard to believe we are nearing the end of the first trimester. I thank God everyday. I never thought we would be here at times. I pray everyday we get to bring our little boy home this Christmas. 

Graduation Day

A bittersweet day. More sweet than bitter of course, saying good-bye to my RE’s office that is. Since 2013, this has been what we have been working towards after all.  

Its been a rough week leading up to todays appointment. A few days ago, I realized that my nausea and gas had tapered off. Of course this made me a nervous wreck. I also noticed I wasnt as thirsty in the middle of the night as I have been and no dizzy spells. Even though my boobs were still passing hubby’s daily test, I had bitten every nail and cried at least 3 times in 3 days. Poor hubby. He even surprised me with a sweet Pandora baby carriage charm to try and cheer me up. It was beautiful and I was so grateful, but still it didnt take the anxiety of a loss away. Pregnancy after loss is brutal. I cant and I wont sugarcoat it. 

In fact, the only thing keeping me somewhat sane was my insatiable hunger. I must eat every few hours or Im a mess. I wont even begin to tell you some of the guilty pleasures I have given into, because I know its the least of my concerns right now. Eating is about the only relief currently for me. Anyways, my RE reminded me via email that around 10 weeks majority of symptoms start to wane. For most, this might be a nice relief, but not for someone who has experienced a missed miscarriage before. 

As I drove to my appointment today, I thought of every drive I have made to the clinic over the years. The feelings of joy, fear, anger, disappointment, loss, doubt, love, hope, excitement…all overcame me. When I checked in, I sat down and stared down at my tiny bump now starting to show. What if I lose it again after all this?All of it seemed overwhelming. I tried to remember the prayers hubby and I said earlier, and the verses we read. Even though it was tough, I knew God was with me. 

It didnt take long for Miracle to appear on the screen. Our baby is doing so great. Look at those little legs! Just from last week the progress is simply amazing. I felt so thankful seeing the life that has been entrusted to me from above thriving.  

I had a bit of a hard time saying bye to my doc. We hugged and talked, I reassured her I would stop in, she told me not to hesitate to get in touch with her and that she is still here for us. We do have 1 embryo left in her care so I tried to remind myself that today is more of “see you later” than “good-bye”
1 week from today we have our 12 week doppler with our OB. Im officially off bed rest, but plan to take it easy still. I did order the doppler as of last night, and it should be here by next week. I figure this will help me get through the weeks Im not getting scanned. Im quite used to seeing baby every week, but at least we will still get to hear baby with this. 

We are anxiously awaiting the gender results. Its been 1 week since the test, and it can take up to 2. I was so set it was a girl initially, but now Im leaning towards a boy. Hubby says girl, mom says boy, and doctor says boy….most of my friends say girl…so who knows! The Old Wives Tales are tied! What is your guess???

In other news, I have many blessings to report. For starters, our cleaning lady is working out great. It really has been a weight off our shoulders right now. We plan to continue this throughout the duration of my pregnancy.  Second, Im happy to report that I am done taking my Del Estrogen injections. One medication down! Third, my dear friend from out of state has put together a package that she is mailing to me this week. The package includes all of her maternity clothes, a sling, baby monitor, etc. How blessed am I to receive this! Next, all of the days I took under FMLA unpaid were covered by my amazing co-workers, meaning they donated me their sick days so I could get paid. I am speechless for this and so happy I work at a school with people that are more like a family than anything else.  

All this being said, despite the anxiety, I am starting to believe this may really be our take home baby. It feels like a lot of things have fallen into place and for that I thank God. Everyday I get to carry this life I am so incredibly honored.