Faith 

The ups & downs of pregnancy after loss continue. I do feel like I am starting to get a little bit accustomed to it which seems bizarre since its so early on (6 weeks, 3 days).  

The bleeding stopped for a few days & has revisited as of last night. I had some slight cramping (for about 10 minutes) and when I went to the bathroom, pink it was. I showed my mom today because I cant really decide if its bleeding or spotting, and she said its spotting. This makes me feel somewhat better. Hubs says the same. At most, I have like a quarter size drop of blood on a pad over like a 5 or 6 hour span.  Thanks to all the ladies out there who have reached out to me & comforted me with their stories of bleeding during pregnancy that did not end in miscarriage. That & God get me through these long days. 

Anyways, due to my wonderful aunts who were in not long ago from out of state, my mom & I had about $250 worth of free coupons to a local department store here in town. When they were here, they earned “bucks” for all their purchases and the bucks could only be used on certain (future) dates. Well, the date for the bucks to be redeemed was today & they have already gone back north. Hence, we got to spend the bucks! Awesome right?

Despite all the bleeding, and doubting, and how early on the pregnancy is, we decided to spend the free money on baby items. Meaning, we decided to choose faith & believe as much as possible today that this is our take home baby. Let me tell you, doing this was not easy at all for me.  In fact, I had a lot of fear, knowing things could easily go left at anytime.  But I have to try and embrace this. 

Here is a pic of what we got (tried to keep it gender neutral)–


Adorable right?!? I also got a casual blue dress that I will wear to one of my bestest friends gender reveal this upcoming weekend. I havent mentioned it before, but she is about 3 months ahead of me. We are both so excited to go through this together & I pray everyday it continues to stay this way.  Ive already lost several pregnancies while pregnant at the same time as close friends. It sucks to say the least. 

Symptoms? 

Pimples!! I never break out but right now I have about 4 popping up. Extreme thirst in the middle of the night. Peeing all the time, & pretty tired. Mostly hungry this week rather than a lot of aversions. Craving fried food, I know, bad!

Praying for a heartbeat this Thursday at our ultrasound. Praying to defy all the odds stacked against us. It would be really really nice to have a Mothers Day down in the books without so much heartache. Please pray for us. 

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17 thoughts on “Faith 

  1. Praying, wishing, hoping, pleading and sending all my good vibes your way. That is definitely spotting and my sister had it all during her pregnancy that gave her her healthy babies!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Good for you! I should take a lesson out of your book and be more positive! My friend had a big bleed at 6 weeks with her IVF baby and it all turned out fine. He’s 15 months old now and a cheeky monkey!! I’m hoping for all the very best for you this week too. Only good news for everyone please!! 🙏🏻

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  3. Positive thinking is definitely the way to get through things that’s for sure! Must’ve been fun baby shopping – lots of cute things! 🙂

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  4. Love the purchases, I am pretty sure I have the same giraffe stuffed animal! Praying for you and excited to hear some great news on Thursday! Keep the faith though I know it gets hard. Just remember, grace wins every time.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. God wants us to have total faith in him.

    Angie and Shane I know that I have told your mom a little of our story, but I am going to pass a little faith story to you. My oldest daughter is 33 years old she lost her best friend and daddy when she was 25 years old, had just graduated from University with a dregree in Art/Education and an 80,000.00 student loan bill. She had been with her then boyfriend for 5 years and the economy had just taken a dump. So there is some back ground…her grief was like nothing she had ever experienced, there were no jobs for her in the education field (especially art) so we work at a minimum wage job, ( causing unreal stress at owing so much money) had to live at home to survive. She became engaged but that didnt last because her young man began to treat her like someone he owned and controlled. She then met someone that she thought was just like her daddy and fell hard quickly but a few months down the road riped the heart out of her chest. The grief, low income job, many heart aches to find that one person to share her life with sent her to her knees and all her deperate phone calls at midnight to her mom wanting to end things and, wanting her daddy and so lonely sent her mama (me) into prayer , stronger faith mode….I started taking bible studies with her, praying intensely…I took a study in circling our prayer. I started praying circles around this child and my other two children daily morning and night for the last 3 years since my studies. She still called me crying…after three years of lifting this child up in prayer to my heavenly Father and standing on his promises that if we have continued faith and total faith and more than one in prayer that he will bring us the desires of our heart. In the 3 years of intense faith she found a job with State Government. In the 3 months we were in Florida she found a home she could buy and afford and not only that God brought her a Christian young man her age who shares her deep faith and makes her laugh daily. They are getting married this October 8th. So my dears God is faithful and he does bring us out desires with faith in his timing and I so am praying my circle around you all that this is God’s timing and you should trust above all that he has a plan for you both. ( It is hard sometimes and we wish he would just give us a glimpse of what that plan is but he expects us to just believe and be faithful). Try to stay positive.
    Love and Circled Prayers Uncle Mickey and Betty

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I love that you chose faith and I love what you picked out. I’m glad it’s only spotting but still so scary. Sending love, hugs, and positive thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

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