1 Year Ago Today…

We did our last FET and I was PUPO (for all my non-IF readers, pregnant until proven otherwise).  

Since we lost baby Isaiah and his twin, I have dreaded this day.  I think I will be OK, overall I am doing well with it. Its just been on my mind 24/7 as we rolled into the month of December. 

Last year, this month was filled with so much anticipation for what could come. It pretty much revolved around appointments, injections, blood draws, and peeing on sticks.  This year is quite the opposite.  We still have anticipation for the future, but its not the same.  

In fact, this is the first time I have approached a prior transfer date without being in the process of undergoing another.  Theres no hiding from it or distractions from it. Its just us, face to face with the rawness that it has been a year now since we got pregnant last. Still hard to believe.

Instead of being on bedrest this weekend as I was last year, we will be heading to Gaylord Palms and celebrating Christmas just the two of us. Im sure it will be on our minds, but Im also sure it wont spoil all we have to be thankful for.  

17 thoughts on “1 Year Ago Today…

  1. Big hugs to you – I hope that you will be able to enjoy yourselves and feel happy and not overwhelmed by sad anniversaries and broken dreams. I’m sure you will get your dream, it’s just so frustrating that the road to it is so difficult. Wishing you love & happiness xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. These ‘anniversaries’ are the worst. It’s a hard time becuz it’s also a great time of year and you want to be happy and normal, and yet, there’s that tug of sadness. Hugs to you guys and I think acknowledging it is the best thing to get back into the groove of enjoying the moment.

    Liked by 1 person

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